Just Drive

Posted: November 22, 2013 in Art, Health, Humor, Migraine, Music, Travel, Uncategorized
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In the town where I live, there is a major thoroughfare that ribbons north and south, making it fairly easy to get to opposite ends of town without much fuss. If you’re in a real hurry, you can take one of the three-digit jobbies that encircle our burgh. Tonight I was on that north-south strip, and headed for the grocery. As I tooled along, listening to my tunes, I came to a disturbing conclusion.

Driving and listening to Miserlou by Dick Dale makes me want to drive very fast, while shooting a gun in the air. Now, for my non-USA friends, I am in a part of the country where owning pretty much any kind of firearm is perfectly legal. Of course, I own no guns, and wouldn’t even let Mr ReloVertigo keep his in our home, when we first moved in together over twenty-two years ago. But that is not keeping me from the spirit of, for some bizarro-world reason, wanting to do this. Heck, I don’t own a convertible, and I’m not left handed, which would mean I couldn’t hang my arm out the window, and I’d have to shoot holes through the hard top of my beloved little car as I zoomed through town, weaving in and out of traffic. What the frack, Friendly Reader? That would not do. Not do, at all.

One of my favorite cities, in fact my favorite city of all, is Chicago. I love that it’s so big and so bold, so bad, it doesn’t need a last name. Everybody in the world knows what you’re talking about when you say, “Oh, yeah, so we were in Chicago, and blah blah blah blahdy blabbity blah.” They will simply nod and think about the Sears Tower. Yes, I know the name changed, but I’ve turned into my parents, and it’s just going to be the Sears tower until I die. Maybe I’ll be lucky like my parents were with Russia, and the name will eventually go back to what I’ve been calling it all along. It could happen. Anywho, the traffic in and around Chicago is a joy. Especially if you accidentally find yourself smack in the middle of downtown at 5:00 PM on a weekday. Let me tell you, cabbies will cut ya for a fare. Cut you off, that is. I swear that they will go zero to at least fifty across three lanes of one way traffic for a guy who looks like he might want a cab.

I should never listen to Miserlou while driving in Chicago.

I know you all have your favorite driving music. Or, even favorite music that you shouldn’t listen to while driving. I’d like to hear about that. Tell me about you!


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