Posts Tagged ‘Confusion’

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This chronic migraine disease is boring holes into my brain, I swear. Giant holes where the smart falls out.

What I heard: …Now, with more of the blood you love!
Me: Yes, because I do love the blood. So much you have to say it like, “Bluuuuud,” to really express the love of the blood. What the frack is going on? WHO loves blood?

What it said: …Now, with more of the stuff you love!
Me: Oh. Ok, then. Carry on.

The smart? It is falling out as we speak, Friendly Reader. Giant chunks.

Sometimes I wonder if I’m in early onset Alzheimer’s Disease. I know that’s not funny to people who actually have been, or have loved ones afflicted with it. And I’m not making fun. I have become so dingy that I have worried a little bit if I might be getting senile. I comfort myself by telling myself that Mother ReloVertigo has always been at least as dingy as I am now, and she is still an industrial engineer. She’s a brilliant woman. Still a ding-dong. I remember Mr Relovertigo, once we’d been together awhile, watching my mom do something particularly batty, looking at her, then me, then saying, “Now I know where you get it.” That wasn’t the best way to the key to my heart. Of course, that was long before I realized that I had become my mother. (more…)